Too many days.

Beginning a new journey.

I'm pretty tired of this endless loop that seems to be my mind. Fear is my current lover and I'm over her possessiveness! She mainfests in other forms, sometimes shrouded in red, sometimes covered in drowning blue sorrow and at other times she immerses herself in a dark veil, preferring to remain faceless in a void of self pity and woe. Fuck her off I say. Perhaps I fool myself into believing I can rid of her sombre, wailing song so easily but I've had enough of the whispers she lures me with. It is time to part company with my doomed lover and find another to share my time with. Hopefully my new love will share the searing light of a summer's day, laying beside me on a bed of sand wafting in salt air of the wide blue sea. Hot and shimmering with new passion.

I've wasted far too many days huddled in the comfort of fear with her luscious red lips speaking half truths and often blatant lies and I playing the sick lover all too eager to listen and dote upon my lovers words. I am a fool but no more will I hear those sick and tiresome lullabies to arouse my sympathy and fallen desire. Let it be, my new quest, to uncover a far more beautiful song to stir the dreams that sleep.

Will I succeed in this endeavour? lest I perish from the grasp of fears desire? It will be a hard road , which will require my utmost attention and vigilance. Like they say where there's a will, there's a way. Lets hope I can remain willfull and not be tempted in the security of the all too familar.