BP 133/82
I've recently puchased a blood pressure monitor and am under doctor's orders to keep track of my BP. I am due to to see her this week's end and to show her that I care or perhaps deceive her into thinking I care, I did as was asked of me. It isn't often that I do as I'm told . It is my downfall, obstinence, my inability to take things I ought to take seriously with an attitude of seriousness. Perhaps I am overly serious to the point of unseriousness. Another of my adsurdities. Ahh well!
I am a amateur physcian at the best of times. For the better part of two decades I have prescribed myself potions and pills to alleviate whatever ails me and I know, better than anyone, that backyard pharmacy can have a detrimental affect. So it is now that I am trying with expedience to let the professionals guide me with my health. I know I am slow, however as the cliche goes...better late than never....But as I said earlier I have difficulty in, shall we say, owning my responsibility with regards to seriousness. Perhaps I think I am immortal, that the adage of it won't happen to me has become entrenched within my soul so much so that I actually wear it like a badge of honour.
Enough with self deprecation! The fact that I am willing to follow the instructions given me, is enough evidence that I am not so fully conceited as to believe that I am immortal. Gnawing at the nether regions of my mind, the idea which lurks away from consciousness is that my life indeed has a use by date and that I am nearing that date on a daily basis. It is an idea I'd sooner not think about at any great length, however it is buried there, amongst the rabble of deceit and one which perhaps has an upside, which could read as follows....I can shape my path to wind in a manner where the Dark Lady who awaits is kept waiting a little longer.
There is much to learn and being the slow learner that I am, time exponentially wearing thinner by each moment, I haven't time to indulge with reckless abandonment. My New Year's resolution for the year 2006 is to stop wasting time and perhaps it can be argued, that by sitting in front of a lifeless machine pondering the essence of deception and self deception at that, is an utter waste of time. However I retort that it is not! I could be sitting in front of another lifeless machine numbing my mind with media mogel's visions of a perfect life and be none the wiser that an infection is occuring.
To be able to reflect and give the voice, which stirs continuously, restless and perpetual, an avenue for focus and awareness is somehow on an opposite polarity to that of wastefulness. Methinks anyways. You may disagree and that is entirley you're prerogative, however if you think thus then why are you still reading?
I am a amateur physcian at the best of times. For the better part of two decades I have prescribed myself potions and pills to alleviate whatever ails me and I know, better than anyone, that backyard pharmacy can have a detrimental affect. So it is now that I am trying with expedience to let the professionals guide me with my health. I know I am slow, however as the cliche goes...better late than never....But as I said earlier I have difficulty in, shall we say, owning my responsibility with regards to seriousness. Perhaps I think I am immortal, that the adage of it won't happen to me has become entrenched within my soul so much so that I actually wear it like a badge of honour.
Enough with self deprecation! The fact that I am willing to follow the instructions given me, is enough evidence that I am not so fully conceited as to believe that I am immortal. Gnawing at the nether regions of my mind, the idea which lurks away from consciousness is that my life indeed has a use by date and that I am nearing that date on a daily basis. It is an idea I'd sooner not think about at any great length, however it is buried there, amongst the rabble of deceit and one which perhaps has an upside, which could read as follows....I can shape my path to wind in a manner where the Dark Lady who awaits is kept waiting a little longer.
There is much to learn and being the slow learner that I am, time exponentially wearing thinner by each moment, I haven't time to indulge with reckless abandonment. My New Year's resolution for the year 2006 is to stop wasting time and perhaps it can be argued, that by sitting in front of a lifeless machine pondering the essence of deception and self deception at that, is an utter waste of time. However I retort that it is not! I could be sitting in front of another lifeless machine numbing my mind with media mogel's visions of a perfect life and be none the wiser that an infection is occuring.
To be able to reflect and give the voice, which stirs continuously, restless and perpetual, an avenue for focus and awareness is somehow on an opposite polarity to that of wastefulness. Methinks anyways. You may disagree and that is entirley you're prerogative, however if you think thus then why are you still reading?
posted by TwistedTripper at 10:58 PM
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